I have been struggling internally with parenting for a while. I swore to myself that I would be a
better parent and not make the same mistakes as mine... I grew up in a fairly dysfunctional family (which I have come to realize, who doesn't?) and I wanted to raise our children better. During this process, I have fretted, worried, panicked, and haven't actually enjoyed having our children because I was worrying about what I was doing wrong with them and constantly beating myself up over how I should of done things instead. It finally occurred to me that regardless of how I was raised, or what my parents did "wrong", I always knew I was incredibly loved. I never felt unwanted, and when I was in trouble, or things were rough.... I knew my parents loved me. And when my mother or father was upset, I wanted to help, soothe, make the problems go away, just as I knew they would for me.
So, I have come to the conclusion that the only real thing I want, is that no matter what -- I want my children to know that I love them. No matter how bad things seem, no matter how crazy the world will become around them, how ridiculous their parents may handle a situation, that their mother (and father) will always love them, and will always be there, no matter what they do. Simple.
Right?
Oh..and I hope my parents forgive me for being unfair to them; the only thing they did wrong, was not telling me the only thing you need as a parent is love, understanding, the willingness to learn, make mistakes, and teach at least one thing (they will learn everything else from everyone else anyway.).
And signing out.
